No, I will not read your f#@king script

[pbray]

Stolen from everyone, professional screenwriter Josh Olson hits the nail on the head.

The newest version of the trend is the folks I've never met who think I have nothing better to do than to read their self-published or micropress book and then give them a review blurb. Often helpfully sent to me as an attachment, which luckily 9 times out of 10 will land their email in the spam bucket, never to be seen again.

Comments

[jjschwabach.livejournal.com]

Once approached at a con by a guy who handed me his *illustrated* masterpiece, then retreated before I could hand it back. Actually attempted to read a chapter. Um. Suggested gently it wasn't quite there, and that your POV character *never* thinks of herself as, "the tiny child," even if she *is* a six-year-old girl. Anyone who's ever been one (and most people who haven't) knows that a six-year-old is a Big Girl.

It gets worse. More than once, third parties have told people that I am a real, published writer and can read their opus. It's one thing to say no when someone asks you. Much harder when someone asks you because someone else has *told* them that you would. (It's happened to me at least twice. Both times... well, you know...)

[pbray.livejournal.com]

It's an amazing imposition that immediately puts you in the no win category, because however you behave you will be seen as rude.

I want a handler or manager, so I can just refer all requests to them, and let them take the heat for the "Nos". Though I suspect that wouldn't stop some people.

[jjschwabach.livejournal.com]

Exactly.

It would be wonderful to have someone who could run interference for you. But no, it wouldn't stop some people. Like the guy I knew who insisted that if his MS was brilliant enough, it wouldn't *matter* that it was hand-written. Because, you know, many of the best-known books were submitted hand-written. I told him not in about 100 years, because, see, there was this invention...